There hasn’t been much going on that I feel the need to report. Hager keeps on asking my (mostly when he’s had a cider or two) if I’m doing okay. I don’t really know how to respond to the question, because he doesn’t tend to believe me when I say yes.
The truth is, I’m doing pretty magnificently. I’m just… stuck in a rut, I guess. Most of the time while doing AOC Summer I haven’t been able to think and ponder over all the big questions that usually get me down – plus, I’m in a very relaxed environment. All social insecurities are gone because there aren’t that many people around, and I don’t feel the need to be anyone but myself. At the same time, I think that does have negatives to it, because I stop reining in my bad habits, my bossiness, sarcastic snarling nature… all because I’m almost too comfortable being here.
The truth is, I’m doing pretty magnificently. I’m just… stuck in a rut, I guess. Most of the time while doing AOC Summer I haven’t been able to think and ponder over all the big questions that usually get me down – plus, I’m in a very relaxed environment. All social insecurities are gone because there aren’t that many people around, and I don’t feel the need to be anyone but myself. At the same time, I think that does have negatives to it, because I stop reining in my bad habits, my bossiness, sarcastic snarling nature… all because I’m almost too comfortable being here.
It’s great fun, especially when the weather is nice. We went Go-Karting on Saturday: Si, M, 4 x Canadians, Tall Irish, Miika, Mari, Australian Woman, Isaac and Me (so not all the AOC crew, but a fair few of us). It was so much fun – the most interesting, amazing, hilarious time I’ve had in quite a while and I really enjoyed it. That’s what life is like here most of the time. I’m tired, shattered even, and a bit headachy, so my body isn’t totally 100% but it’s okay because my mind and soul are.
Sometimes I think it would be nice to go home, but at the same time I’m not sure how I feel about that and I haven’t really tried to explore the emotions. Driving is going well and hopefully I’ll pass my test when I sit it on the 15th of July… almost everyone here will be gone before then, bar a few Brits including myself, the Canadians and J.C. It’s a weird thought – in two weeks time I’ll have lost most of the AC people, but at the same time I’ll still be on AC campus. It doesn’t feel like it did when I was at school though. The entire atmosphere of the place has changed.
We also had a treasure hunt on Thursday night just gone (today is Monday). It was absolutely fantastic. There are so many things that Si, Rob and M (though maybe not Rich) put on for us, their ‘staff’ but also I guess friends, to bond and chill and work together. It almost makes me want to work in the Outdoor Education system – there are so many opportunities to do incredible things.
